With Whom Should You Spend Time? Part Three: Unbelievers from Your Home Country.

Unbelievers from Your Home Country (Bottom Left Box)

This box represents unbelievers who you know, regardless what country they live in. They could be past acquaintances or people you just met. If you live in a capital or main city, many more will fall into this category. Also, if you choose to frequent Western-style establishments, you are more likely to meet people from this group. In a sense, they are part of your mission field.

What the Bottom Left Box represents.

When we think about ministry overseas, our first instinct is to imagine the local people God has called us to serve. But many workers quickly discover that foreigners are also present in significant numbers, particularly in large cities. This also includes unbelievers from their own home country. Business professionals, diplomats, teachers, NGO workers, and students from the West often pass through the same communities where missionaries live. Sometimes they stay for years, but often they are only temporary residents.

These individuals represent a unique slice of the mission field. They share our language, cultural reference points, and sometimes even our hometown region. Unlike the bottom right box (local unbelievers), these relationships rarely require cross-cultural adaptation. For this reason, engaging with unbelievers from your home country can feel natural and uncomplicated. But the ease of connection also carries a risk: you can become so comfortable here that you neglect the very people God sent you overseas to reach.

Past Friendships That Fade

I have had several unbelieving friends from the U.S. whom I kept in contact with from overseas, but as the years passed and everyone continued to stay busy, those relationships suffered. This is a common experience. Distance, time zones, and shifting life circumstances create barriers that even the strongest friendships cannot always overcome. While some connections endure for decades, many gradually slip into the category of occasional acquaintances.

It is important to recognize that letting some relationships fade is not necessarily a failure. Ministry is not about clinging desperately to every contact. God moves people in and out of our lives according to His purposes. The key is to remain faithful in sowing seeds of love and truth while you have the opportunity. Whether it's through a holiday invitation, going out for coffee, a quick video call, or even a thoughtful email, your faith may leave a lasting impression even if the friendship itself does not remain.

Building Relationships Overseas

I developed many relationships with foreigners in India. For example, there was an Urdu language school in Lucknow with students from the U.S. Although I did not meet them all, I invited the ones I knew to our Thanksgiving meal and invited others to church. Most of these people came in and out of my life rather quickly. Although I am glad to have known them, almost all were acquaintances.

Experiences like these illustrate the transient nature of this category. Language students, exchange participants, and international employees often rotate in and out within months. That means your influence may be brief, but it can still be meaningful. Inviting someone to a holiday celebration may be the only time they encounter a Christian witness overseas. A single conversation at a café could plant a seed that God can still be watering years later.

Knowing this leads me to remind you of an important principle: do not underestimate short-term connections! You may never see the fruit of your involvement with an unbeliever from your home country, but eternity may reveal that your small act of hospitality or your honest testimony played a crucial role in their spiritual journey.

The Draw of Camaraderie

Some overseas workers have several non-Christian friends with whom they spend time. This is especially true for people with children in a local international school or a secular job. These environments naturally create opportunities for friendships that can be both enriching and challenging.

There is no denying the emotional comfort of camaraderie. Sharing laughs with someone who understands your humor or discussing news from back home can be deeply refreshing. For some workers, this fellowship acts as a stabilizer, helping them endure the more difficult aspects of cross-cultural life.

However, as stated earlier for the top left box, be careful how much time you spend in it, especially if it does not align with your vision. The question is not simply whether these relationships are enjoyable, but whether they serve the greater calling of your missions journey. Evaluate the effects these people have in your life. Do they pull you deeper into God’s mission, or do they keep you orbiting familiar comforts while the local harvest field goes untouched?

Clarifying Your Calling

If camaraderie helps you emotionally to work better among your target people, then develop a presence in this box. As for me, the camaraderie did not make a difference, and therefore, I only spent a little bit of time here. God has given me a desire and love for the bottom right box, so I did not want to spend too much time away in other boxes.

Even though I personally felt a stronger calling towards the people in the bottom right box, not every missionary will allocate time in the same way I did. Your calling may not be identical to mine. Some may sense that investing deeply in unbelievers from their home country is exactly where God wants them to be. For others, like me, the heart’s pull lies elsewhere, and lingering too long in the bottom left box becomes a distraction from my primary mission.

The key is discernment. Spend time in prayer asking God to clarify where He wants your focus. Reflect on your personality, gifts, and emotional needs. Then set boundaries that reflect your calling. Without intentionality, you may drift into relationships that are pleasant but ultimately unfruitful for the Kingdom.

Practical Guidelines for the Bottom Left Box

1. Recognize the Mission Field:  Even if they share your passport, unbelievers from your home country are just as much in need of Christ as anyone else. Do not dismiss them simply because they are familiar.

2. Invest Wisely in Short-Term Connections: Treat every encounter as an opportunity for Gospel seeds. Even a brief friendship may have eternal significance.

3. Avoid Substitution: Time with fellow Western unbelievers should not replace your investment in local people. Ask yourself regularly whether your balance reflects your calling.

4. Use Hospitality Creatively: Holidays like Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Easter provide natural bridges for sharing your faith with Westerners abroad.

5. Evaluate Emotional Benefits Honestly: If camaraderie truly helps you stay effective in ministry, then embrace it as a gift. If not, be ready to let it go.

Final Thoughts

The bottom left box reminds us that God scatters people across the globe for many reasons. Some of those reasons intersect with your path, giving you a chance to be a witness to unbelievers who may never step into a church back home. It doesn’t matter who you come across; your role is to love them, speak truth with grace, and keep your eyes on the mission God has entrusted to you.